Recently, a video has been making the rounds on X showing the moment a mom finds out she is pregnant with triplets. It has provoked rage at both the mom, for being shocked and fearful rather than instantly grateful, and the ultrasound technician, for saying “I'm sorry” to the woman panicking in front of her. Like many videos passed around to provoke rage engagement, this one is not even that new. It was posted a couple of months ago, but the actual events happened almost three years ago. The triplets are now two, and everyone seems to be happy and thriving. I look forward to it popping up every few months to start the rage cycle all over again. But who is angry? And why?
Well, ever since the Lindsay Clancy trial, a not insignificant portion of right-wing men have come down with what can only be described as Lindsay Clancy Derangement Syndrome. They genuinely seem to believe that most women, especially those who express anything negative about motherhood, no matter how slight the complaint, hate and want to murder their children. They have worked themselves up into such a frenzied hysteria that now they see a mother being shocked to find out she is having triplets and they take that shock for hatred of her own children. The ultrasound technician, because she is sympathetic rather than screaming at the woman to be grateful, must hate babies too. No, I am not kidding and I am not exaggerating:
It would be easy to show the hundreds of more examples that I saw, but you get the idea.
I will say that it was not only men but overwhelmingly men making these comments. I saw perhaps two, maybe three comments from women along the same lines (though typically less vitriolic). Even more conservative and right-wing women, especially the ones with children, were marveling at the reaction of the hysterical men and sympathizing with the mom in the video. Obviously, plenty of men who have not been afflicted with Lindsay Clancy Derangement Syndrome were just as incredulous at the response.
This is basically a replay of something I touched on last month: a series of videos depicting the intrusive thoughts of postpartum moms that were portrayed by these same types of men as videos depicting women's desire to harm their newborn babies. Women, especially those who'd had kids but definitely the majority of women, easily understood what the videos were about, just as they understand the reaction of the triplet mom.
But these guys seem unable to read anything but malice into absolutely anything to do with women and babies. Every action, every word, every tone, even every tiny inflection is cast as sinister. Think I am being hyperbolic? Even the technician’s squint was lambasted as some sort of glare of hatred at the babies. It should be obvious to anyone, of course, that she was simply trying to do her job and take precise measurements of three babies in a dim room while the patient was freaking out.
It also shouldn’t need to be said, and I’m sure it doesn’t need to be said to my readers, but it is perfectly understandable to be shocked and scared when hit with the news that you are pregnant with triplets. Triplet pregnancies are much more dangerous for the mom and the babies, and carrying three babies is very hard on the body. You are then basically guaranteed to need an early delivery (by C-section) and a NICU stay for the babies, assuming they all make it. This is nothing to take lightly, especially if you actually care about the babies.
And then there is the prospect of caring for three newborns and beyond. I will admit that when I was pregnant, I did have a naive little hope for twins. One and done would be great, right? And look, somehow I could have done it, especially because I am blessed with very supportive family. But after experiencing my one baby, let me just say I am relieved it wasn’t twins. If I ever find out I am pregnant with twins, I would definitely have a moment of panic. I can’t even imagine hearing the news of triplets (more babies than boobs???), especially now that I already have an existing child to care for, as the mom in the video did as well.
Anyone who actually has experience with babies and anyone who actually cares that those babies receive adequate care would react similarly. It is completely normal and completely human to be shocked at receiving such news. And that’s what disturbs me the most: the inhumanity of the response to a video of a mom whose life was totally turned upside down in that moment. And what did she do after her initial response? She got on with her life and gave birth to the girls. To demand that she receive such news with a saintly grace is sadistic, especially coming from people who can’t even keep their composure online.
The reaction also showcases really misguided ideas about what it means to live well and virtuously. A lot of the blessings in life aren't blessings because they are easy and can be breathlessly welcomed with open arms. Much of what is valuable and worth doing is hard and daunting and understandably provokes shock and fear. To insist that showing any weakness is a sign of ingratitude is incredibly controlling and coercive behavior that you know comes from men with a hair-trigger who likely explode when inconvenienced. In other words, only the worst people demand that others behave perfectly in situations they could never handle with composure themselves.
Not to mention this very strange idea that women in the past would celebrate the news of triplets with no trepidation whatsoever. This, of course, isn't true. These mythic women of a mythic past are only held up to paint “modern women” as weak and ungrateful. Any woman in the past, when even a single childbirth was much more dangerous, would rightly be scared if she suspected she was pregnant with multiples. It is nothing but another form of dehumanization. Modern women are dehumanized by being devalued. Past women are dehumanized by being idealized. Neither are allowed to just be human.
(I'm not going to delve into this here, but it brings to mind the Madonna–whore complex. It is also a fantastic example of the psychological splitting inherent in Cluster B personality disorders. These men have a lot of problems.)
Seeing this atrocious behavior from mostly right-wing men also makes it obvious to me that “woke” is in no way restricted to the left. In the same way that woke progressives make hysterical and unhinged accusations of bigotry at (mostly) straight white men, so a lot of these guys are now choosing to scapegoat women (and other groups, but in this specific example it’s women). The idea that a great deal of women secretly hate and want to murder babies is just as repulsive to me as the idea that gender non-conforming children are “trans” and need to be medicalized. Both manifestations of woke are completely deranged.
Reading these comments and seeing this sentiment grow has also been drawing up images in my mind of the BLM crowd cornering a woman sitting outside of a coffee shop, screaming in her face, and demanding that she raise her fist in solidarity with them. It’s the same type of mob energy, and it’s very unnerving.
Do I think that these guys are going to come out from behind their keyboards and start similarly rioting in the streets? No, at least not any time soon. I think they are a much smaller fringe minority than BLM activists and followers were. But it’s still not to be taken lightly. Woke also started and proliferated online, but it didn’t stay there. I think we definitely shouldn’t be complacent in this situation either.
Anyway, most women love their babies, and woke hysteria is always wrong about whatever group it is targeting. Unfortunately, no one seems immune to the woke mind virus, no matter their politics. We all need to be on guard.